Guest post

This Was My Own Piece of Cake

Piece of cake

Okay, so where do I begin?
The beginning had no promise and you’ll leave before we get to the juice, the middle was a complete shabble, uncertainties that’d make you wonder if there would be an end, but there was an end and the end was…my piece of cake, well, it wasn’t the end we expected and you’d think the whole thing was a waste of time and effort.


Years later I think different…

I wouldn’t tag myself a player but with me, the ladies come and go more than they stay and it rarely had anything to do with them it was mostly me, don’t judge. Well, I liked to explore and moreover, you only get to know if a cookie is good after you taste it and I tasted quite a lot.

I and my buddy lucent were ‘it’ that year, we weren’t exactly birds of the same feather but we did flock together, ‘it was either Slimani or Lucent or Slimani and Lucent’ – I’m only trying to say we were as contrasting as we were similar so we stayed together.

Childhood friends, preschool, high school till college. When it came to ladies Lucent was the opposite of myself. No! He didn’t marry the first girl he kissed but she stayed through a phase of his life and when she had to leave it wasn’t his fault, he wasn’t an angel still and I wasn’t the devil either. We didn’t judge each other, we laughed about our lives rather and loved each other like brothers till we got to college.

From our high school days we had planned what we called ‘college heist’, we rented a for-two apartment (so each person could get freaky comfortably) in the farthest school from home which we planned to use as a springboard to jump over our parents, dependency, and every other hater.

I’ll try to be straight to the point and as short as possible so you don’t waste your time here

A month or so into the second semester of our first college year Lucent finally had a girl, ‘the girl’, he introduced us as people do when they find ‘the one’, her name was Yael. She was of mixed heritage too numerous to count and she looked exotic in a great way, by then I was already on my fourth or fifth girl but none tasted good enough to keep – that was the way I used to put it.

Lucent made it clear she was the one for life and I could tell he meant it from the fire in his eyes, it didn’t bug me, I didn’t care about them or their love until she semi moved in and I began to see more of her. I felt something but considered it nothing as I’ve felt it thousands of times and it always goes away but this one lingered on. Lucent didn’t notice the long stares I gave her, he trusted his buddy or maybe he felt I had too many girls to be bothered with his.

There was something different about Yael, it had nothing to do with the fact that she was perfectly shaped – that’s a rarity, one in a million, or the fact that her eyes were golden and had fire in them, not even the fact that her lips were marvellously full – fuller than Angelina Jolie’s and leaves me salivating at their sight but this girl was just unique, she was so intricately and carefully wired to perfection that I felt like I had been chasing the wrong ones all my life.

Describing it in the simplest way possible, in layman terms for those of you not schooled in the art which I considered myself a professor I’d put it this way – Before Yael, I was too much for the other girls I had been with but with her I felt I needed to level up, to be more than I already was – I used to feel I overflowed my cup.

Keeping my promise of not wasting your time I’ll spare you the details but it was a long run, I was always close but never had her. When I could take it no longer I came up plain to my buddy, partly to prove my genuine love to her and partly to tell him to back off; he was disappointed and thus began the rift between us till we no longer saw face to face.

I went all-out on Yael with no success, she puzzled me. The language she spoke was different from everything I knew but I kept trying, the closer I got the farther she seemed. At that point, I doubted my manhood, save for the northward projection from between my legs I could have concluded I was something different. It was at that point I began thinking like a human than as a man, testosterone had failed me. I still didn’t get the girl but I lost a friend, Yael had claimed to still love Lucent but he let her go so things wouldn’t get worse than they already were between us.

I pushed till there was nothing left of me then I fell out, by then we are almost in our third year. So I stayed off women for the remainder of my college days, the last girl before Yael was my last, Yael isn’t on that list because I didn’t make her cut. It was a humbling experience for me. Ties with Lucent were already too severed to be fixed, he moved out of our crib when the Yael drama heated up and things stayed that way till we graduated.

I couldn’t go home because of shame, I had picked a chick over a bro and didn’t win. I travelled south for a year hoping to find redemption, it wasn’t south. When I finally mustered enough courage to return home Lucent was already out of town, no one told me anything but I’m sure there were side talks and gossips.

The story doesn’t end badly though

I tracked up Luc and met him up, brothers don’t grudge forever you know. We made up and began rebuilding our friendship, along the line he and Yael got back in touch and hit it off – she was undefiled, I didn’t even win a kiss.

Took longer for me to get back to the ladies booth and when I did my intentions and methods were different. My lady is smart and I’m humbled to be her man.

My wedding is in two weeks, Yael and Luc are thinking about making their own happen soon. Sat here today reminiscing all these stuff and how life played out for us all, it’s nine years this year since we graduated from college. The way things played out destroyed the status quo of life and love as we have always known it to be,

  • As hot as you think you’re you can’t have just anyone and everyone
  • There’s still true love and it’ll wait for you.
  • There are a lot of loyal ladies that will love only you
  • You may think you have them but they are not yours if you can’t keep them.

A lot of these things I wish I knew while I was younger then I wouldn’t have wasted my time and missed out on some valuable years of friendship, too bad I can’t go back and right my wrongs but you can! You can learn from my mistakes and live better. Thanks for reading through.


Guest post written by Baritudor


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